Trying to Answer Astigirl's Questions [Unfinished]

Questions taken from the first Chapter of Tweet Sering's Astigirl: What do I want? What do I dream of? What do I care about? What are my sterling qualities? What are my miserable traits? What can't I stand? What do I stand for? What will I die for? What will I live for?

I don't have an answer for all of those questions right now, but here are some random thoughts that were effected into being when I read those lines: What do I want? Well, I want to be happy. What does that mean? Well that means that I want to have a happy family. What is a happy family? A happy family is one that loves each other and has no financial or health problems. How will I make sure that happens? by become a successful surgeon; a pediatric surgeon in fact. Or a psychiatrist. I'll get to more on that later.

Whoa that was chaotic. And just from one question. Let's skip to my answer for the last question: What do I live for? Well, I live for my family. Is that a bad thing? Does this mean that aside from my family, my life is empty? Another important question: How can I be empty when I'm so full of myself. Side comment: I'm a genius. Or almost a genius. Or slightly above above average. Oh well. :(

According to Astigirl: "In our culture, personal independence- or any form of focus or reliance on the self= seems to be regarded as unnecessary, if not altogether arrogant."

My thoughts: When should we stop thinking about the greater good? When is it okay to start being "selfish"? Is it selfish to want to be an artist instead of a doctor? (Or a professional DotA players instead of a doctor?) Am I selfless because I want to be a doctor, or just arrogant?

In the Philippines (a predominantly catholic country), it seems that self-awareness, which comes at the expense of being part of "the collective" is frowned upon, because it breeds heresy and agnosticism. and eventually atheism. It seems that faith is opposed to self-awareness; religion teaches us that it's okay not to understand the universe- and by extension, ourselves. That is just wrong. So wrong. Wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong.